No, that's not me. Not yet, anyway.

Let’s roll back the calendar about twenty years…

diddly-da, diddly-da, diddly-da

I’d just seen “Buddy: The Buddy Holly Story” at the Victoria Palace Theatre. Several years earlier, my Nan gave me a tape cassette of Buddy’s hits that added another layer to my expanding collection of fifties and sixties rock ‘n’ roll music (for years, I felt that I’d been born in the wrong era. That changed again when I heard Guns N’ Roses!).

I was desperate to learn to play the guitar. One of the guys at school had a no-name electric for sale, which I duly bought. It was a typical “first guitar” – a dire strat copy with no truss rod, action like an egg-slicer, weak pickups and an annoying “thunk” when anything was played above the 11th fret. But it had six strings and a jack socket – and I thought I was the canine’s undercarriage.

I sat down with some of our music books (I’d played keyboards for years; learning tunes through the infamous “Busker” series) and tried to learn some chords. A, E, D, G and C swiftly followed. F proved to be a bit more challenging, so I chickened out and learned B7 instead. Another friend showed me “Wild Thing” and “Walk, Don’t Run” by the Ventures and I was hooked. I absorbed anything guitar related with relish and I set about learning every song on the “Buddy” soundtrack CD (the second CD I ever bought).

Let’s come back to the present…

diddly-da, diddly-da, diddly-da

Twenty years later, I’ve owned and parted with more gear than I ever dreamt possible. I’ve played at least a hundred gigs and, through the wonders of the electrick interweb, have met (and played) with a fabulous bunch of people (you know who you are). But all the while, Buddy’s music was there in the background… the chordal rhythm/lead style, the simple three-chord tricks of the early songs – everything.

In late 2009, I received an invitation to a Facebook event from one of my friends that’s been involved in am-dram musicals for many years… her company, the Stevenage Lytton Players, were holding auditions for a production of “Buddy” to run in May 2010 – was I interested in coming along? Er, yes please!

Audition rehearsals came and went. I would’ve been happy to be just part of the band; either on-stage or in the pit but hell – nothing ventured, nothing gained – I auditioned for the lead role. Now, I haven’t acted since junior school but the director must’ve seen something as, come audition day, I was nominated to play Buddy.

I know it sounds corny, but I’ve really been given the chance to fulfill a dream I had twenty years ago; to play the part of someone who’s had a profound effect on my life, in front of a paying audience. I’m still working hard on my lines (not to mention my Texan accent) and the songs are all coming flooding back to me.

So, if you’re not too far away, it’d be great if I could see some of you in the audience! The production takes place at the Gordon Craig Theatre, Stevenage, from Weds 19th through to Sat 22nd May 2010. Performances start at 7:45pm and tickets are available now from the Box Offices at both the Gordon Craig and the Stevenage Lytton Players.

And the rest… will just be rock ‘n’ roll.

So, in no particular order, I give you the winners…

1. Another Brick In The Wall Pt II (Pink Floyd) – specifically David Gilmour’s guitar solo.
2. Sweet Child O’ Mine (Guns n’ Roses) – right at the end of the “where do we go” section (at 5:11), Slash repeat picks a full tone bend on the top E string (22nd fret), followed by a let-down 18 to 17.  Spine-tingles all round.
3. Somewhere Over The Rainbow (Eva Cassidy) – it may be an overplayed, clichéd bit of schmaltz, but EC’s pure voice, combined with the innocence of the song, hits me square in the guts every time.  Don’t know why, don’t *want* to know why… All I know is that it has the power to cause a little dust to enter my eyes.
4. Cause We’ve Ended As Lovers (Jeff Beck) – I had to pick one JB tune and this is it.  Late at night, sitting in the darkness, glass of wine and this on the stereo. Perfection.
5. Little Wing (Jimi Hendrix) – it’s Hendrix, and a world away from the guitar-burning, feedback-laden live performances that many people think of when JH comes to mind.
6. In The Air Tonight (Phil Collins) – bear with me on this… The transition from drum machine (808?) to the power drums just lifts me; almost like a double espresso after a relaxing meal.
7. Fire (Jimi Hendrix) – yup, him again. Why? ‘Cos I can.  This one always peps me up, without fail.
8. Albatross (Fleetwood Mac) - Peter Green and Jeremy Spencer’s high harmony bends, Mick Fleetwood’ subtle cymbal rolls… Simply sublime.
9. O Fortuna (from Carmina Burana, Carl Orff) – Got to ‘ave a bit of culture, ‘aven’tcha?  I performed this years ago with my school choir.  The opening bars blew the first row of the audience back three feet… Now’s *that’s* music to move you.
10. I Want It All (Queen) – to quote Jeremy Clarkson, “POOOOOWWWWWWEEEEEERRRRR!”

 That’s it from me – anything you’d like to add?

* “Wonderboy” – The mighty Tenacious D.

I only really tend to use two (rossedwards and rosspix) but both of those are obviously derived from my real name; as is the domain for this site.

Why can’t I come up with anything… good?  I seem to get some kind of “bloggers’ block” that somewhow prevents me from choosing something different, yet memorable.  Many of my friends have splendid aliases (you know who you are earthman, mudshark and spaghetti) and, quite honestly, I’m a tad envious of their ability to come up with these “alter egos”, seemingly on a whim.

Some might say that I’m getting a bit long in the tooth to be worried about nicknames; or that I may have something to hide if I want to use an alias online.  But actually, no – it’s part of a greater longing, to be seen as a creative, imaginative individual rather than one that just follows the herd.

I haven’t had that many nicknames in the past (and even those weren’t exactly original), so what am I to do?  Is there a successful formula for developing one’s own avatar?

(At this point, I’d like to apologise if I’m sounding a bit out of sorts – regular bouts of listening and reading Stephen Fry can do that to a man.)

Maybe I should have a competition?  Those that know me (and those that don’t) can suggest a few alternatives in the comments below.  I look forward to your contributions.

R.

Follow my trains of thought at http://twitter.com/rossedwards

My local bank has started stuffing its cash machines with fivers…

What’s it about? See here.

1. A Harley Benton GA5 baby valve amp
2. A THD Hotplate (8 ohm, please)
3. A Boss RC20XL Loop Station
4. A Digitech Vocalist Live 2 (the Live 4 is all very nice, but I don’t want to be too cheeky)

That’s it – not very much at all.

TIA,

Ross.

Nah, that couldn’t be why they’re giving them away…

…could it?